Poem 1

I Didn’t Help

She insisted on a hug and kiss

I would run away

She smelled like the cloudy smoke of a cigarette

When she needed help with her suitcases

I would make myself look busy

I did not want my hands on those old ratty things

A glass of seltzer

And a banana

Others can fetch it

But certainly not me

She’s not even family

I would always complain

But all too soon found myself

Sitting by her side

The nurse inserted the needle

We traveled into a different world
For those afternoon hours

One plastic sac attached after another

I watched eyes filled with uncertainty

Staring back at me

Why didn’t I help when I could have?

Now I have no power in this battle

So I just watched and softly grazed her hand

And I came to know her

A person who had dreams and hopes for her future

I became too familiar with these hallways
On the oncology floor

The bright colored garden painted on the wall

Appeared gloomy and gray

The nervousness and fear disguised

By the wide smiles of cheerful nurses

And then the sound of a ring

Rising over the howling call of the bitter nighttime wind

Why didn’t I help when I could have?